Platform Erection

How the 1500 pound structure moved from the Doctor’s back yard to its current upright location is hard to explain; not hard for me to explain but, with all due respect, hard for you to understand. Did the Doctor explain telepathy to your satisfaction in his earlier post? Most of you seemed satisfied, but I could not help sense a lack of full comprehension (dare I say doubt) in a few of you. Raise your hand if you are one of them.

This is the platform in the Doctor’s back yard:

backyard platform

If you cannot have faith in the things you do not fully understand, read no further. We have no patience with the ignorant. However the Doctor tells me that all of his friends are intelligent, thoughtful humans with varying degrees of spirituality. I believe him. Thus I shall briefly discuss transvection and the physics behind it. If any of you would like a more detailed explanation, fully referenced, let the Doctor know by e-mail. But first, on with the story.

Southern Florida
March 10, 2013

Harriett was halfway home when she heard the distress call.

There had been a strong head wind for five straight days. Harriett had taken her turns as the lead osprey but was always relieved to fall back into V formation. El Nino was naughty this year; air surface pressure was high and the trade winds shifted westward. The skein decided to take a more direct, westerly path hoping the warmer water of the Gulf would provide a more abundant food supply. It was a big mistake.

Nothing was going to plan; the head winds were brutal. The Deepwater Horizon platform loomed ahead like a death skull. All of the north-central Gulf was a monstrous dead zone. The long flight over miles of uninterrupted water afforded no place to rest. By the time Harriett and her skein reached the Chotawtchee Bay on the panhandle of southern Florida, they were thin, gaunt, exhausted and basically starving.

Back in North Carolina the Doctor was struggling too. For a week he had been considering various ideas for moving the 1500 pound platform from his back yard, to the site he thought we would be most happy. The components of the problem were straightforward. They involved: crossing a four foot fence with the ¾ ton structure , crossing 75 yards of marsh; then crossing another 75 yards of shallow water, mud and oyster shells. Once the structure had been transported, it somehow needed to become vertical. Once vertical it had to remain vertical, through future winters, nor’easters and possibly a hurricane. He found the problem vexing.

The Doctor was still fairly confident he would succeed; a workable plan would come to him shortly he thought. But day after day no plan revealed itself. Frustration lurked in the shadows.  Anxiety followed, just out of sight.

“Where are the good ideas when you need them”? He unfairly questioned the Muse on call.


Muse on call

He could not sleep.  The human that lives with him was tired and wanted to sleep. She knew why the Doctor was restless, but felt it best to remain silent.  Another hour passed.  Finally the Doctor spoke.  In undisguised irritation, he asked her,

“Well, what do you think? Don’t you have any ideas”?

The answer was clear and precise.

“It’s impossible”.

Desperately the Doctor shifted his modes of cognition to as many as he knew.

“Do I accurately understand the problem perceptually”? He asked himself.

“Is my memory accurately representing the problem”? Has all the relevant information that applies to the problem been considered? Have I identified all the different aspects of the problem? Am I still in the box? Has my cognitive functional fixedness tendencies precluded me from conceiving obvious alternatives”?

“Cognitive functional fixedness?” The inquiry continued. The voices got louder until they were screaming. Confidence left. Doubt slipped in. A dark cloud formed and a black dog barked. The Doctor awoke with a jerk. It was 11:32 PM.

Back in Florida, earlier in the day Harriett thought she sensed a sigh on the Doctor’s channel. At first she ignored it. She was plenty busy trying to regain her strength for the last leg of her migration. Around suppertime, she could have sworn she picked up a moan.

“What’s going on with the Doctor”? She thought. “I’ve never felt him like this.”

Thinking about her friend, she settled down for the night in a large mango tree. Suddenly Harriett was awakened. A clear cry for help filled her consciousness. It was 11:32 PM on Monday night.

The burst of telepathic energy frightened her. She knew something was wrong. And of course, despite her weakened state, she called him immediately.  The Doctor’s line was open, almost as if he hoped she would call.  At first he was embarrassed, not wanting to admit he was sending such a strong distress signal. But the connection was loud and clear and Harriett sensed relief.

Greatly relieved to hear from Harriett, the Doctor unloaded the whole story along with all his anxiety worry and self-doubt. Harriett listened carefully.

The Doctor finished up by telling Harriett how much he appreciated her.

“How frail humans are” she thought “Why do they get upset over such things”? “Why is the Doctor reluctant to ask for help? Doesn’t he trust me? Aren’t we telepathic companions”? “Have a little faith for nature’s sake”!

Telepathic concentration
Harriett in full telepathic concentration

Let the truth be known:  Harriett had fallen in love with the Doctor. It disturbed her greatly to feel his pain. And as Love often does, it lead Harriett to make a less than responsible decision.

What to do?

Gravity is most commonly recognized and experienced as the agent that gives weight to physical objects. The gravitational force is mediated by a massless spin-2 particle called the gravitron. Gravity is one of the four fundamental forces of nature, along with electromagnetism, and the nuclear strong force and weak force. The phenomenon of gravitation is a consequence of the curvature of space-time.

Anti-gravity results from the negative spin of gravitrons.  It is the discovery that merged general relativity and quantum field theory. The paranormal term “levitation” is nothing more than directed neural oscillations, influenced by expanding Boson particles, that negatively affect the spin-2 particle. In individual neurons, oscillations can appear either as oscillations in membrane potential or as rhythmic patterns of action potentials, which then produce oscillatory activation of post-synaptic neurons. At the level of neural ensembles, synchronized activity of large numbers of neurons can affect the time-space curvature and a reversal of gravitron spin.

Osprey and most cerebrally developed organisms take transvection or “levitation” for granted. Evolution gradually removed this ability in most mammals as they became land based with no need to fly. The last humans to possess the ability were the witches of medieval Europe. They could fly up chimneys and in the air by means of broomsticks.

In general ospreys do not like to get involved in human affairs. This is an imprinted understanding handed down among all the higher functioning creature on planet earth. The doctrine was originally concieved by the general whale population and distributed in a ultra sonic wave format. There have been many translations since then. It was quickly accepted as logical and wise by the rest of the non-human animal kingdom. The responsibility to enforce this ancient creed has fallen to the dolphins.

What to do? Rang twice, as Harriett bathed in a shallow pool of crystal water among the mangroves.

“There are a lot of dolphins in Choctawtchee Bay”’ she thought. “And a lot in North Carolina too”.

Harriett had never considered doing anything outside of accepted osprey behavior, but…………but……….

“What are the ramifications if I get caught? Will the dolphins notice? Is my plan moral? Yes. Is my plan ethical? Yes. Legal? Yes Is it responsible? No.”

Harriett was sure that a general concessions of opinion would be: “You should not have done it”.

“I sure don’t want to live in that “life in a tree nest” again. Wouldn’t a nesting platform be nice? And gee, I’ve been looking forward to Ozzie’s surprise for months. My friend feels terrible; at his wits end, frustrated and depressed”.

What to do? A third time.

Harriett came up with several plans. The one she liked best involved the Happy Fairy. She knew she could count on her. One of the Happy Fairy’s pleasures is to look out for the Doctor.

The conditions were perfect. It was late at night. Clouds covered the N. River; there would be no moonlight or starlight. There was no wind or rain. Low tide was at 3:48 AM. The earth’s rotation had been steady for millions of years and Jupiter was aligned with Mars. It would only take a few seconds.
All she needed was a six foot sink hole open for a moment. This is where Harriett needed the Happy Fairy. The touch of her wand would create it instantly. It would collapse into itself with in minutes and secure the upright piling permanently. The timing had to be perfect but they could work in real-time.

Love is a powerful force. Sometimes it leads to foolish decisions. Harriet knew she was being imprudent, but launched her plan any way.

It happened instantaneously at 3:48, without a glitch.

The next morning.
Tuesday March 11, 2013

The Doctor awoke the next morning feeling better. It had been a long time since he had used his telepathy for an extended period and he likes to practice his skills periodically.
Bush teeth, shower, shave, dress and into the kitchen for a cup of coffee. Looking out over the river he saw this:

Ozzie starts the nest on new platform - Copy

A hallucination? The structure he had built was no longer in the backyard. There were no marks on the ground to indicate it had been moved. A dream? No, he was awake. Disbelief? Seeing is believing.
The Doctor called to the human that lives with him.

“Yes” she said “it is real. How did you do that”?

It was Ozzie and he had already started building their nest.

To this day only the Doctor, Harriett and the Happy Fairy know the truth. The Dolphins never even noticed.

The Happy Fairy

About Harriett Raptor

Eight-year-old mother of five, fluent in telepathy, a possessor of genetic memory, a genius and scholar. Harriett holds the equivalent of a PhD in philosophy, biology, chemistry, physics, astronomy, and the Homo sapiens’ concept of the humanities. Her understanding of mathematics and logic are beyond Homo sapiens’ current comprehension. Harriett is a thinker, a wise osprey, especially distinguished for her expertise in the Homo sapiens problem.
This entry was posted in Ospreys. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Platform Erection

  1. Mark Merrick says:

    Great Addition!! I like the Happy Fairy.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s